Answered by Ustadha Zaynab Ansari, SunniPath Academy Teacher
In the Name of Allah, the Gracious, the Merciful.
I pray you are in good health and iman.
As in every situation, major or minor, we take our plea for guidance to Allah Most High. First, pray salat al-Istikhara, the guidance prayer, which the Prophet, Allah bless him and give him peace, directed us to make whenever we faced a momentous decision in our lives. The details of Salat al-Istikhara are available here at SunniPath at http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=1&ID=1056&CATE=4.
Second, I really can't tell you what to do because your decision is contingent on the outcome of your own istikhara and your family dynamics. This is the type of decision where you should implement shura, or mutual consultation. Talk to your older sister and see if she is willing to help out with your younger siblings. Talk to your younger siblings and see how they feel. Alhamdulillah, they are both at an age where they don't need constant supervision. However, they will always want to know that their older sisters are there for them. There are several possibilities to consider:
A. You can get married and move closer to your younger siblings.
B. You can get married and arrange for your younger siblings to stay with you part of the time, and with your older sister the rest of the time.
C. You can defer your marriage for a certain amount of time until you are more comfortable with the idea of your younger siblings living alone.
D. Or perhaps you can locate some other family members who would be willing to take your siblings in, or even relocate to live with them.
May Allah Ta'ala have mercy on your parents and guide you and your family to the decision that is best for everyone's worldly life and religion.
And Allah knows best.
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