Question ID:
16871
Friends or Enemies
Answered by Ustadha Zaynab Ansari, SunniPath Academy Teacher
Question:
I have been doing my best to forgive, but there is one thing that is making it hard for me to. In my islamic school, the principal has chosen 2 students from each grade to be the leaders of the school. and alhamdulilah, I was chosen. But my classmates are annoyed and possibly jealous of me. This school year, alhamdulilah, the teachers are very impressed by my work and they continue to complement me, and this just adds to my classmates' jealousy. A few days ago, in computer class, onw of my classmates took the chair I was going to sit on, I moved to another chair, and she took that spot also, I was a bit annoyed so I told her to stop being a buttface. I know it was wrong of me to have said that, but it slipped. Anyway...my classmates loudly said,:oooooooooooowww" and "she is an Amirah of the school and she is doing that" I am very sure they said this to get me in trouble, but anyway, I was kicked out of class and I sat in the prinicipal's office for 45 minutes. I am annoyed at my classmates for tryin to get me in trouble and also because they are jealous of me and want to have my job. I am not trying to be suspicious, but I am sure they are mad at me. So my question is should I talk to them as less as possible, unless necessary, or what should I do? Because when I usually forgive them, I end up getting too close to them and they hurt me again and my heart aches. SO what do I do?
Answer:
In the Name of Allah, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful
Praise be to Allah Blessings and salutations to our beloved Messenger
Dear Sister,
Assalamu alaikum,
I pray this message finds you well.
The
key with Ramadan is to take the lessons we learn and apply those to our
lives throughout the year. As the Prophet, Allah bless him and give him
peace, tells us, "When the month of Ramadan starts, the gates of
the heaven are opened and the gates of Hell are closed and the devils
are chained" (Bukhari).
What this means is that Ramadan acts as
a mirror for us. We get a good, undistorted reflection of who we are
and what challenges we need to surmount.
Your experience with your classmates should tell you several things:
1.
We return bad treatment with good treatment. Allah Most High says,
"Repel evil with that which is best: We are well acquainted with the
things they say" (Al-Mu'minun, 23:96). So our duty, as God-fearing
Muslims, is to always take the higher path. Even if your classmates
deliberately provoke you, you should not respond in kind. Instead, you
maintain your composure and dignity and take the matter to school
officials, if need be.
2. Jealousy is one of the most powerful
of human emotions and can spur people to do things running from the
very petty to the outright malicious. In the case of your classmates,
it sounds like this is a petty kind of jealousy. Recognizing this, you
should continue to discharge your duties and, if appropriate, see how
you can motivate your classmates to rise above these squabbles and do
their part to contribute to a positive learning environment. After all,
a class leader is there to serve.
3. Forgiving your classmates
is the Islamic and Prophetic thing to do. However, if you forgive them
and they still hurt you, then you should ask Allah to forgive them and
perhaps limit your contact with them. You can still interact with them
cordially, but you don't have to be in constant company with them.
May Allah Most High bring your hearts together.
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