Answered by Ustadha Zaynab Ansari, SunniPath Academy Teacher
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
Praise be to Allah. May the peace and blessings of Allah shower upon our Beloved Messenger, his family, companions, and those who follow them.
Dear Sister,
Your obligations to your parents are to respect them, treat them kindly, and obey them in everything that is halal (permissible). If you are experiencing abuse at the hands of your parents, you have several options depending on what type of abuse this is. If this is a case of emotional or mental abuse, perhaps you can explain to your parents how they are making you feel. Try to appeal to any sense of taqwa or decency they might have.
If you are being physically abused, then I would advise you to go to a trusted relative or friend's house. Make sure that you're not going into a situation that may be worse in terms of non-mahram males or the like.
Physical abuse should not be taken lightly, so if this is the case, you need to remove yourself from the situation to preserve your health and safety.
You mentioned marriage without your father's consent. Are you considering marrying as a way out of this abusive situation? If this is the case, according to the Hanafi School, you can marry without your father's consent, provided that the person is Kuf' or suitable in religion, lineage, and profession. I would still attempt to get the father's permission. However, if your father is the one who is abusing you, then you are allowed to seek a way out of this situation by going with the Hanafi School.
Finally, please try to consult a local scholar who can further advise you.
And Allah knows best. And Allah alone gives success.
Umm Salah
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This is advice that is generally applicable to your case, given the details mentioned. However, we highly recommend--in all such cases--that one seek the counsel of a reliable local scholar or counselor. Please use the search engine at www.SunniPath.com for related answers.
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